My main focus is to help you achieve between bands 7 to 7.5 in writing. It is quite challenging to achieve any higher if you have never studied in an English-speaking country. So, I am trying to keep this as realistic as possible without the promise of getting band 9 after reading a couple of my essays. 

Band descriptors are the measurement that all writing task 2 (and task 1) essays are evaluated upon. There are four main criteria as follows: task response, coherence and cohesion, lexical resource, and grammatical range and accuracy. 

Here, we are examining the first one: task response. 

The band descriptor for band 7 in the task response reads as the following:

1. The main parts of the prompt are appropriately addressed.
2. A clear and developed position is presented.
3. Main ideas are extended and supported but there may be a tendency to over-generalize or there may be a lack of focus and precision in supporting ideas/material.

Let us scrutinize each single point of the aforementioned conditions to achieving band 7.

1. The main parts of the prompt are appropriately addressed.

This refers to whether you understand the different types of questions there are in writing task two or not. There are four different types of essays: opinion, discussion, discussion-opinion, and a two-part question.

• If the question requires opinion giving and you don’t state your opinion clearly, you lose marks. 

For example, the question below is a two-part question that plainly asks for your opinion in the second part of the question. If you do not provide your opinion in the introduction paragraph, you lose marks.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones.

Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

• If you miss to cover a part of the question, you lose marks.

In the same previous example, if you do not cover at least one reason for the case of young children using their smartphones daily, you will lose marks.

• If you misread the question and go off-topic, you lose marks.

In the same previous example, if you discuss the effects of smartphones on everyday life because you misread the question, you lose marks.

       2. A clear and developed position is presented.

This is especially important when you are asked to give your opinion, even if it is a discussion-opinion essay. The essay should always be leaning toward your stand. This means that you should give a stronger argument to the idea you are choosing to be your opinion. 

1. Main ideas are extended and supported but there may be a tendency to over-generalize or there may be a lack of focus and precision in supporting ideas/material.

Many people get stuck here and they do not know how to go on with it. You have to read much on the topics that may be on the IELTS test because it also evaluates your ability to provide support and argument to your ideas not only your English language abilities. 

Check out the full essay below and read the examiner’s comment on why it achieved band 7.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones.

Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

The invention of smartphones has changed the world dramatically. Many young individuals consume too many hours staring at those bright colorful screens, though. This essay is an attempt to shed light on the reasons behind this new addiction and how, in my opinion, it has negatively affected many lives.

Smartphone developers exquisitely create applications that are engaging. They compete over an individual’s attention to make money out of the ads displayed to users. They build algorithms that automate the process of understanding a user’s interests to keep showing them content that matches those interests. The victims of those techniques are the young generations who have never experienced life before smartphones. As a result, they continually keep scrolling down. Additionally, there is always the fear of missing out. This fear stems from having the social need to belong to a group of people. For example, a teenage student at a high school may need to follow up with the latest news and rumors that run in their school, so they can keep up with their social life. Thus, preadolescents are the ones who pay the utmost price for this advancement. 

The hallmark of this remarkable invention is, counter-intuitively, negative. Despite its obvious indispensable benefits, it brought a number of drawbacks. To illustrate, young individuals who are addicted to the usage of those gadgets have displayed symptoms similar to the addictive behavior of those who suffer from substance abuse. This is exemplified in their aggressive attitude towards whoever tries to take away those devices. Therefore, this development poses an unprecedented challenge to all caregivers.

To sum up, whereas this invention has been of great use to humanity, many youngsters fall victim to the influence of its enticing design which has resulted in dire consequences to many parents and care providers.

298 words

N.B.: Writing between 270 and 310 words is vital to achieving band 7 in this category.

The examiner’s comments

Task Response: Your essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the reasons behind smartphone addiction among young individuals and its negative effects. You present a clear stance and provide examples to support your argument, such as the engaging nature of smartphone applications and the fear of missing out. However, you could further elaborate on the impact of smartphone addiction on mental health and social relationships to strengthen your argument. Additionally, consider addressing potential counterarguments to provide a more comprehensive analysis.